Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
