i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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