I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize