Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
