Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
