Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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