none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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