Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize