my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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