I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
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