It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
