But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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