Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
