well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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