why didn't you poke me back
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize