This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
