im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
