Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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