Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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