Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
