I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Pants are for mortals
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
