I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
