I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
