Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
