Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize