I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
me + whiskey = a bad person
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
