Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Everclear isn't food dammit
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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