Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
