Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize