I want to stick my p in your. b.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
