eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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