Ambien. No doubt about it.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
