with your own penis?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
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