Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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