ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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