Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
