he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Success! We fucked roommates!
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
