please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
