Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
