wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize