I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I wish I only lived at night.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
