I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize