Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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