they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
