its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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