he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
