ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
