Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
