Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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