question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
